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Writer's pictureLana Abu Ayyash

Good times and tan lines




Fabiana: we are all a bunch of crazies here


Me: Well hallelujah, I am in the right place





House hunting, will it ever end?


Between houses, looking for one, or anticipating being kicked out of one … a continuous Turkish saga, with a level of drama to match


I booked an Airbnb (what else can a girl do?) unaware of the fact (bad timing is my second name, right after BadAss) that I am landing in this part of the universe just as the highest season in the history of high seasons is about to hit..… we are talking a brutal 400% ++ increase baby. Istanbul to Antakya, EVERYONE has got the Airbnb disease. And although making money is a vital human right, someone, somewhere must put a limit on this insatiable appetite for more and more …. even good o’l greed has its limits y’all.



Literally my first day in Datca I joined a women's rights march



Leo: I know this guy Nick, he mentioned something about his neighbor wanting to rent his house. I think it has a sea view


Me: a sea view cannot be that bad!


Leo: partial sea view, do you want me to check that out?



The Landlords:


A tall, athletically built American Brant greets us as we pull in with a huge welcoming smile, I introduce my humble self and thank my lucky stars again he is not an emlakçı.


I take off my shoes – not my favorite Turkish custom – and step into a Fuschia clad artsy, corky living room with an attached kitchen. My eyes linger on my hostess, however … why am I not surprised … an Italian! I’ll let the photo describe Fabiana for you.





I am gonna write about Fabi in a separate blog as I am soon to start a series I call “exceptional expats” …. some other interesting non-expats too. She gracefully consented to me using her photos and writing about her life. We would later sit, and have a lengthy conversation – more like an interview – yet, there is still so much more that I need to dig up, I mean this woman has spent a lifetime roaming the globe, living in 110 countries or what she loves to call 42% of the world, only to be beaten up by Jason – coming later – that there seem to be a none dull moment in her life including her husband.



Location: Datça iskele, “Covered” Saturday farmer’s market


Situation: damn busy, swarming with vendors and buyers


Lana and Janet maneuvering their way through the crowds


Right in the middle of all the chaos … a smiling tall athletic guy on his big bike … a scene!



Brant, where shall I begin?





A published writer (I am reading his book), a guitar player and singer, and as he likes to call himself a “death” podcaster – you better believe it, me and he had a long discussion about death and how important it is to LIFE in a “party” last night – he has two podcasts, a website, blog, and a pre-Fabiana love life worthy of its own soap opera/ movie. Brant is in his 60s Fabiana is 50 and they are both as active as Quicksilver. They don’t own a car, they are semi-nomads – with Datça as their base camp – and their zest for life is incredible. The story of how they met and fell in love is soooo damn interesting that I interrogated them for every bit of detail of it.





Just like that, I made two new friends, got me a rental deal for 3 months: July, August and September, bike included, and listened to more interesting stories than I would in a whole year.

Now this leaves the end of May till the 7th of July hanging loose, no plans so far, did I mention before that planning is not my superpower?


Hiking the Lycian way sounds good to me, it takes 30-40 days in all, and I have always wanted to do it, one tiny issue though, work!


Let’s leave this to the universe, shall we?






Cheers to the people:



Location: sea, a full-on yacht/ sailing race


Leo: you don't sail this boat, you drive it, sailing is different


Leo: I'm a professional sailor you know


Lana: you are!


Lana (speech bubble) for God's sake just ask him to teach you or take you for a ride


Lana: smiles daftly instead



Leo arranges this get-together/ meet & greet sorta party at a bar here called Cheers. I loved the idea (never miss an opportunity to meet loads of ppl). True I don’t touch Alcohol but I usually have the most fun anywhere I go. And I did have fun that is.


An “adult” who – in one of my previous 7 lives – spent the majority of her life in the gym, or hanging out with athletes/ buff dudes (I was the only female in the industry), who were always YOUNG, literally under 30.


Last night was, how shall I say it, UNIQUE. First off, although I was far from the youngest I felt very young. But what interested me the most was being surrounded by people with a vast life experience – instead of me always being the only one with any sort of experience – I loved all the stories – gosh I was like a police interrogator – I loved the openness and ease that comes with maturity. Insecurity fades away with age until it completely vanishes, this is why we think of very old people as “weird” or “have just lost it”, in reality, they just don’t give a damn. Cool that!


There was French Veronica and her Algerian Hubby, the sweetest man ever (I met them later). A Colombian dude (can’t remember his name), Fabi the Italian and Brant the Yankee, a bunch of English people – including a lady who has been in Datça for 20+ years -, A German Lady – whom I thought was a native American - and David, her corky 80 something dancing/ singing boyfriend, there was also Jason – a Canadian – and his boyfriend Brett from South Africa, I clicked with those two immediately and will get together soon, I mean those two dudes traveled 150 countries and been literally ALL OVER Turkey, and lastly, Janet (the Dutch living in a Turkish village) who is a good friend now.


An honorable mention goes to D from Manchester with the accent to prove it (who was not at the party). A trainer at the gym and an MMA guy, he is 60 and looks not a year older than 45, lean, trim, and shredded, with a full-shaven head to complete the look. He is the nicest dude EVER.


Mr. D: ……..back when I was a street fighter?


Me: you were what??????


Mr. D: a street fighter, right before I switched to boxing and MMA


Me: a goofy smile


Me: I wanna fight; you will be the one to teach me MMA, I wanna kick some ass.



Finishing off this “people of Datça” parody and the cherry on top is all the awesome granddads and grandmas I am meeting almost daily, from Sayim who stopped me in the farmer’s market to compliment me on my physique, then invited me for tea and shared his family history/story (he comes from a really good lineage)




Hadice who sat next to me on the beach, shared an apple and a lengthy conversation in Turkish I understood very little of. Ibrahim who lives in a tent out in nature, Baris, always with a big headset, who frequents the exact same spot daily, talks politics and goes on about how Erdoğan is the best thing that happened to Turkey since the invention of tea, to Macda and her sister, two retired math teachers, who will soon be leaving to Bodrum to live on their private boat, Burcu a retired MD who lives in a small village, grows and makes EVERYTHING, rescues village dogs, and listens to English and French podcasts when working in her garden, and listen to this, she now speaks impeccable Oxford English and conversational French. Last I’ll mention Nadia, an amateur botanist who literally roams the trails around Datça looking for wild edible plants … And for those encounters, I am the happiest.



To be continued ….





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