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Writer's pictureLana Abu Ayyash

Born in August, a Virgo be you then !



Not yet, I was born on the 26th, 5:00 am to be exact! so if you are contemplating sending/ giving me a gift, this is your chance. The list includes but is not exclusive to:


1- Dark chocolate (fancy, not less than 80% cacao)

2- Freshly ground Gourmet Coffee, single origin, medium to dark roast

3- Steak (heavily marbled ribeyes, T-bone, TOMAHAWK) Wagyu and Kobe if you love me too much

4- Vibram 5 fingers running shoes or Vivo barefoot

5- Aged cheese (Italian, French, and Spanish)

6- Puppy (Pitbull, Rottweiler, GSD)

7- A gym

8- A trip to Paris (Italy would do too)

9- A wolf

10- Idris Elba


Honestly, I know zilch about horoscopes, the fact that me and Ed Gein share the same star sign is enough to throw me off the horoscope wagon for eternity (but may be of use to you my reader) Of course until i remember that Leo Tolstoy (my fav author of all time) is also a Virgo and then i am like, okaaaaaay there must be something to those star signs after all.



Bodrum, the underground!




My bag gave in the ghost in this journey




I drop my bag at the Selçuk bus stop and head to town (I wholeheartedly forgive/ donate the bag and its content to whoever steals it). I have an hour to kill. It’s a bit past 10:00 am, but nothing is open so I pop in the A101 to stock on some nuts and fruit bars for the journey.


Munching on a bag of good’ol stale Noce, i pass a shady looking bar, barely open, tables littered with glasses and empty bottles. I get in and ask if they serve coffee! Dude looks at me as if to say “what do ya think the answer is lady!”, then a sudden change of heart, he asks if tea would do instead, i answer with an affirmative then stress it be a big one (I have no shame whatsoever). I see him go to his neighbor, and come back with a cup of tea. I thank him, sit down, get out my pen and paper and start scribbling some existential thoughts. I am still trying to decipher how did that place trigger my utmost pressing life dilemmas.






It is a pretty hot day, and I can’t but wonder what type of hell Bodrum would be. Luckily the bus was adequately cool, which is not to say comfortably cool. The ticket inspector welcomes me with a big hello – almost a hug – I remember him from a previous trip (I always remember the underdogs even by name, it’s the snobbish and pretentious that rarely leave a trace inside my brain), we exchange gestures and turkenglish words , something like I remember you, you remember me …etc


An all-male trip except for a girl sitting in front of me who kept making a fuss with her selfies, she probably took 70000 ones in every pose and position possible. I have nothing but good wishes to her and her kind.


Yasin (ticket guy), whom I assume was 19.5 decided it was a good idea for us to get intimately acquainted at this moment in history. He does not speak English, but if there is a will there is Google. By now Google has become my second language and main form of communication, it is just not the best course of action for lengthy convos and boy wanna woo girl typa situation.


Yasin did his best (extensive use of sign language, poses and smiles), at no avail, I could almost see fellow passengers who were watching this live entertainment – without a blink – shake their heads and roll their eyes. However, I ended up giving him my number. Not sure what does giving your number mean in today’s world, it means zilch to me, so for all the dudes out there, unless I am giving you a 100% positive that I like you AS A MAN – in the flesh - and with solid proof, I am just being a nice human. I don’t see male-female interactions anything to fuss about. Ok, I may flirt, but that’s just like “liking” a post or a photo. Nothing means anything if it was nothing. Told ya I studied philosophy!


This being a frugal trip I decided to spend the night in Bodrum to splurge a little, and by that I meant booking a pansiyon room with an AC, the idea of sleeping in a cool room seduced me into paying almost double what I was willing.





You must be kidding me. Bodrum bus station was almost like a small airport, clean, civilized and COOOOOOOOOOOL. No Dolmuş here, those buses were airy, big and pleasant. I know this will sound pathetic, but I lingered there for a while to enjoy the coooooooooooool.


Bodrum centre was HOT! The Otogarı was BUSY, I look around, people pouring from everywhere. Damn this town is popular. This being a luxurious kinda day – this phrase is loaded with irony - I decided to take a taxi.


I show the driver where I am heading, and for some reason it pisses him off, he says: you can walk there, you don’t need a taxi. I show him the bag and distance on the map. Not impressed he just stares at me with what looked like contemp. That really bugged me; my fight instinct kicks in, I don’t want to let this go so I say: why are you so angry (he speaks English). That made him even angrier. I add: come on just take me there. He frowns, sighs, and as if squeezing out part of his kidney he says: ok get in. And I do, very happily at that. It just did not end there, I say the moment I settle, we are gonna be legit about this won’t we, you will charge me by the meter right?


Biting more than his lip and tongue, he holds the meter and spits an angry contemptible YES!


Note: he was not the only taxi, there were a bunch of them, but I am Circassian!





The place was cute, room gave the word “basic” a new definition, and it lacked EVERYTHING, but that did not surprise me. I find a lady – who seem to do everything from cleaning toilets to checking in – and ask for a hot water kettle, I wake up early and I’d have a nervous breakdown before any coffee shop opens (the pansiyon is just a few rooms nothing else), she calls the owner who refuses, then I call the owner and explain my desperate situation, she reluctantly agrees but stresses (with many repeats) that I : “unplug the kettle from the socket as soon as I use it”


Exactly 20 minutes after I settle into my room, the electricity disappears, I call the owner again, and the first thing I say: I swear did not use the kettle yet!


Hungry, I raid all the nut and fruit bars I packed for the journey to Datça, drink some coffee, shower, get dressed and head out to explore town.


I admit, I came here biased, and by that I mean I decided a year ago that I won’t like Bodrum because of the type of people – who are my friends by the way – who go there a lot. And it is high season, so the world, its wife and children were there. How can a beach pack so many humans I had no idea.




Bias aside, it just beats why is this city a major tourist hit. I just don’t see anything special.

I think about it, and it hit me, the answer is right there in the question itself, A TOURIST, so yeah it made sense. Tourists are folks on holiday, and holidaying in Bodrum takes the form of getting wasted, laid, partying …etc. This may not be appealing to me but it is to them.


To me the city reeks of booz, sex and drugs. And after a day there all I wanted was to rush to the shower and scrub that energy off me.


Aside from that, I did have fun, and in spite of the heat managed to walk the whole area and enjoy every bit of that. I also met quite a lot of people and made a few acquaintances, some of which were interesting and fun.





Nosying inside some alley I catch a dude tucked in a corner devouring a big hunk of chicken with gusto! I love such people; I give him a big smile and say: Afiyet olsun. He flexes his – nonexistent – bicep and answers “energy”, offers me a bite, I decline but join him still. We chat a bit, laugh a lot. And then i leave him to get on with his work.





But my favorite person there was Alice, a super duper cool guy. And I like his hair!





I was sitting on a bench facing the sea and a dude with big yellow hair approaches me and compliments me on my “trousers”, and just like that, we become friends.


We sat – on the same bench - chomping corn and exchanging stories. He used to be a backpacker. He went on and on about how things/ and Bodrum used to be back in the day. He spoke good English so it was easy to tell jokes and just be silly.


We watched the sun – he had a secret spot - as it gloriously melted into the sea. Just before it got dark, I bid Alice goodbye, I sleep early, and I had a long day tomorrow.





I shower and hit the sack pronto. I wake up at 12:00 burning as in literally. It is a damn sauna in here. The AC has died and only emits warm air. I open the tiny window but this is a very crowded area of the city so zero air flow, besides it is friggin HOT outside. I decide to go to the terrace or roof. Closed!

Room suffocating I give up and go sit on the sidewalk, although hot, it was probably 6 degrees cooler. That does not work though, THE DRUNKS, shouting, laughing, swaggering … I cannot stand it, better put up with the heat.



Cooling down my feet is the best solution



I wait for the first traces of light, and the noise from outside to dissipate, then hit the beach to watch the sunrise. The marina still reeking of alcohol and rancid garbage, few people swaggering around holding half empty bottles, i stray far away, and find myself a nice spot where I can enjoy two hours of peace and gratitude.




Done with my morning duty, I hug the sea, send some kisses to the skies, head back, pack my bag, and walk to the Datça ferry boat. A new chapter has begun!


To be continued …










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